What makes a great parent?
A good parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a great parent is not only identified by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A good parent does not have to be ideal. Nobody is perfect. No child is ideal either … keeping this in mind is essential when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting isn't about achieving perfection. But it does not mean that we should not work to that goal. Set high standards for ourselves then and first our children second. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
The following are 10 suggestions that can help you be a better parent, learn great parenting skills, and stay away from bad parenting.
They are not all that simple or fast.
And probably nobody can do them all the time.
Although you may not necessarily do all of these things, however, the recommendations in this parenting guide can help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Don't just tell the child of yours everything you wish them to do.
The most effective way to teach is showing them.
Human is an unique species in part since we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them into our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
So, be the person you want the child of yours to be - respect your kid, demonstrate to them good attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - and your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Demonstrate the love of yours.
There's simply no such thing as loving your child too much. Loving them can't spoil them.
Just what you choose to do (or give) in the name of love may - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these things are given in place of love that is real, that is when you'll have a spoiled child.
To love the child of yours can be as simple as offering them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also listening to your child's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love is able to trigger the release of feel-good hormones like oxytocin. These neurochemicals are able to bring us a deep feeling of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the child, will develop resilience and also not to point out a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with around hundred billion brain cells (neurons) with comparatively few connections. These connections create our thoughts, drive the actions of ours, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we're. They are created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to see positive experiences themselves and provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they won't have the development type necessary for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Use a tickle marathon. Go to the park. Laugh with the child of yours. Give them good attention. Ride with an emotional tantrum with them. Solve a problem together with an optimistic attitude.
These positive experiences create excellent neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals that your kid carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it appears to be difficult to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior issues. But it is possible by utilizing positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a good parent means you have to teach your child the morals of what's right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent will be the golden rule to good discipline. Be kind and firm whenever you set rules and enforce them. Concentrate on the reason behind the child's misbehavior. And make it a chance for them to learn for the future in a positive manner, instead of to get punished for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR The CHILD of yours
Tey letting your child know that you will remain there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Children raised by parents that are constantly responsive tend to have better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, and emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Most of us already know the importance of communication. Talk to the child of yours as well as listen to them thoroughly. By keeping an open line of communication, you'll have a better relationship with the child of yours as well as your kid may come for you when there's a problem.
But there's another reason for communication. You help your child integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work in concert to have a healthy body. When different parts of the brain are integrated, they can function harmoniously as a whole, which means fewer tantrums, more good behavior, much more empathy, and better mental well-being.
To do that, talk through troubling experiences. Ask your child to describe what happened and how they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't have to provide solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to become an excellent parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words will help them make sense of their experiences and integrate their memories.
#6: Reflect on Your own CHILDHOOD
A lot of us wish to parent differently from the parents of ours. Even those who had a good upbringing and a happy childhood might wish to alter some aspects of the way they had been brought up.
But really often, when we open our mouths, we speak the same as the own parents of ours did.
Reflecting on the own childhood of ours is a step towards understanding why we parent how we do. Make note of things you would like to change and think of how you would get it done differently in a real scenario. Try to be mindful and change the behavior of yours next time those issues come up.
Don't give up in case you do not succeed at first. It will take practice, a lot of practice to consciously change one 's child-rearing strategies.
#7: Focus on Your own WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Pay attention to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things such as the own needs of yours or maybe the health of the marriage of yours are placed on the back burner when a child is born. When you don't take note of them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to strengthen the relationship of yours with the spouse of yours.
Stressed-out parents are more vulnerable to fighting. Don't hesitate to ask for parenting assistance. Having some "me time" for self care and stress management is crucial to rejuvenate the brain.
How parents take care of the child of theirs physically and mentally can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, the child of yours will suffer, also.
#8: Do not SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking can result in short-term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
Nevertheless, this method doesn't teach the kid right from wrong. It only teaches the kid to fear outside consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with inappropriate behavior.
Spanking the child of yours is modeling to your child that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or hit is much more prone to fighting with other children. They're more likely in order to become bullies and also to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in daily life, they are also far more apt to result in oppositional behavior and delinquency, even worse parent-child human relationships, mental health problems, and domestic violence victims or abusers.
You will find an https://parentinghowto.com/ assortment of better alternatives to discipline that have been shown to be much more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's your goal in increasing a kid?
When you are like most parents, you want your child to excel in college, be prosperous, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy positive relationships with you and others, be to care and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and also satisfying life.
Though how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
If you're like most parents, you probably spend most of the time just trying getting through the day. As authors, Bryson and Siegel, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain kid, rather than helping your kid thrive, spent most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not allow the survival mode dominate the life of yours, the next time you're feeling frustrated or angry, step back. Consider what frustration and anger can do for you or the child of yours.
Rather, find ways to turn every negative experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums can be turned into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you concentrate on teaching the child of yours, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is to take advantage of what is already known by scientists.
Parenting is among the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, practices, or traditions have been scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for increasing a child and information which are backed by science, here is one of my favorite science based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using scientific knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all approach. Every child is different. Quite possibly within the very best parenting style, there can be many different good parenting methods you can choose according to your child's temperament.
A very good example is using spanking to discipline. There are numerous better alternatives, time-in, reasoning, e.g. redirection, etc. You can choose a non-punitive discipline method that actually works best for your child.
Naturally, you can also decide to use "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or maybe spanking) and might still buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has found us that children with various temperaments react to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more vulnerable to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but worse outcomes under poor parenting.
Those who are much less prone may "turn out fine" no matter how strong their parents treat them. But it does not mean those practices are great. These children are simply fortunate. They can thrive despite poor parenting, not because of it.
Why take a possibility with sub-par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can help you save lots of time and agony in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great thing is, that although parenting is difficult, it is also really rewarding. The bad part is the rewards typically come later than the hard work. But in case we try our best now, we will ultimately reap the rewards and have absolutely nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!